Conversation

Umineko is funny because when it is at its best it's a witch going "look, it's magic, this is magic, I am using magic to mAterialize shit in front of your fucking eyes" and on the other side is the dumbest boy alive going "nuh-uh, just because I am dumb as dirt it doesn't have to be magic".

And this is somehow entertaining. It's a dumbass going "I've watched too much Scooby Doo so I'll believe impossible contrivances are possible and I am just too dumb to know how before I'll accept the supernatural" and it's fun!

But then there's also the constant, endless, repetitive exposition.

I keep reading that this is "widely considered the a masterpiece, possibly the best the Visual Novel medium has to offer" and I can only think the medium needs better quality standards, holy shit. It is tortuously written, over half of what I read so far (30 hours in) is basically filler words, repetitions of concepts established again and again and again and again and again. Flat insipid clichéd characters are fleshed out for hours but they never gain more depth, they are just as shallow but in a bigger space.
It is so frustrating that the novel does have genuinely good moments and writing that is hours and hours apart, because reaching them feels like wading through mud, it's slow, annoying, exhausting and you never get fucking anywhere.